PRESIDENT IN
2008?

In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have "the rule of thumb"

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Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled "Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden"...and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.

My wife, the noble Princess Nafetah, called me from the other room...this goes on all day when we are at our lovingly networked computers. I heard her voice: "Baby? Could you come take a look at this?" I found her bewildered, looking at a picture of Chuck Norris. "Why is this funny?" she asked me.

Dear Friends, this is a random find from a random newsgroup at some University. It is such a gem, I pass it along intact, in probable violation of copyright law, netiquette and the scuples of an enlightened being...nevertheless I believe you will enjoy it...

8-D

The husband leans over and asks his wife, 'Do you remember
the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind this very
tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you.'

'Yes', she says, 'I
remember it well.'

1. A day without sunshine is like night.

2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.

3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.

1. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.
2. A will is a dead giveaway.
3. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
4. A backward poet writes inverse.
5. In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism,  it's your Count that votes.
6. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.

Albert Einstein Funny Quotes

1. The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.

2. As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality.

3. Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.

Blonde and lawyer jokes are among my favorites.  And my favorite blonde joke of all time goes like this:

What happened?

At first I thought this was funny...then, I realized
the awful truth of
it. Please, Be sure to read all the way to the end!

Tax his land,
Tax his bed,
Tax the table
At which he's fed.

Tax his tractor,
Tax his mule,
Teach him taxes