Bush is a Methodist Saint

George Bush is a Methodist saint.

President George W. Bush was scheduled to visit a United Methodist
Church outside Washington as part of his campaign.  Bush's campaign manager
made a visit to the pastor, and said to him, 'We've been getting a lot of bad
publicity among Methodists because of Bush's position on stem cell
research and the like.  We'd gladly make a contribution to the church of $100,000
if during your sermon you'd say the President is a saint.'

The pastor thinks it over for a few moments and finally says, 'The
Church is in desperate need of funds and I will agree to do it.'

Bush shows up and, as the service progresses, t! he pastor begins his
homily: 'George Bush is petty, a self-absorbed hypocrite and a nitwit.
He is a liar, a cheat, and a low-intelligence weasel.  He has lied about
his military record and had the gall to put himself in a jet plane landing
on a carrier posing before a banner stating 'Mission Accomplished.'  He
invaded a country for oil and money, and is using it to lie to the American
people. He is the worst example of a United Methodist I've ever personally
known...But compared to Dick Cheney and the rest of his cabinet, George Bush is a
saint.'